Falling Off The Edge

Published November 18, 2017
(Click on bold, blue titles to explore the many links)

Falling Off The Edge
by the Ghosts of Paraguay.
(Click the blue link to hear the song on You Tube).
The first inspiration for this piece of writing.
I call it my compassion song.
Brings me efficiently to the feeling of Compassion.
[An hypothesis for me: it could also be called Brain-Synch or “Using 100% of Your Brain”].
The song really connects me to this complex emotion: compassion.
I really cannot know what compassion means to others,
But for me … it is a combination of heartbreak, love, sadness and hope.
Not sure that this combination of words really captures fully how I feel compassion.
I consider it a Superpower.
Sometimes, when I feel it, it is a very physical force.
Like waves emanating from my heart.
Bizarre and strange as it is beautiful and rich.
I feel compelled to attempt to express this to the world.
Compassion, for me, is often associated with awareness of tears welling.
Rarely does a tear fall, but sometimes a large soulful tear or two accompanies.
Usually just from one side. The left.
My medically trained brain feels this associates with my right brain.
The more creative, holistic side of the brain.
Yet, via the Corpus Collosum, both sides of the brain communicate together.
I sense that on earth today, there is a wide variation in development of the Corpus Collosum.
I feel my thinking patterns got upgraded somewhere along the way.
Via an eclectic mix of modalities and focused intention.
Also, a massive roto-rooter effect of three episodes of what Medical Science calls Psychosis.
Yet, as a Physician and person with lived experience, I know that this term does not optimally describe a complex energetic experience that serves to optimize my mindset in the long term.
The trick in shining a light onto this epic misunderstanding within Medical Science is that the knee-jerk reaction is to abort the process via pharmaceuticals not allowing the proper support to the evolution to a more natural state.
No hard feelings. Anymore…
Yet I choose to share my knowledge to the best of my abilities.
Dr. Bruce Lipton describes what he calls hemisphere synchronization.
One day, perhaps I can demonstrate this on a functional MRI.
(Just thought of that).
Yet, it may not show up on this particular functional diagnostic device.
I feel that Physics trumps Biology.
Another concept that may explain why we are lagging in our optimization attempts as a Human Race.
So focused on Biology … and Chemistry.
When in fact, we may be much better served focusing on Physics.
Of Consciousness in particular.
A subdivision of Quantum Physics.
Magical, invisible forces that we do not yet have devices to measure.
(To my knowledge anyway.)
Ancient wisdom alludes to these, yet they keep getting lost in translation and are widely, to now, not optimally understood in a collective way.

The last few days have found me swimming within the waters of compassion.
I feel the chaos around me in the world.
Sometimes it is far away.
These past days, it closed in to my daily life.
I generally choose to spend most of my time alone as much as I am able.
More and more, I feel a strength that I can interact with the world more optimally.
I can remain centered within the eye of the storm, so to speak.
I will spare you the details as they likely will distract from the core message.
I feel that the dramatic details do that a lot in most people’s lives.
Whips them into the storm and they have no idea how to center themselves.
Makes sense to me.
I do not see role models for this commonly able to demonstrate it.
I hold intention to become one, if I am not already there.
Willingness is not so present in people, to be aware of a better way to weather the storms of life.
It has always worked this way.
A lack of faith or hope that it could function any other way.
Makes logical sense.
And yet …
I feel I know another way.
It is kind of challenging to explain.

Let me share a key analogy that might allow you to connect to my mindset.
I see most people behaving like they are cameras.
Able to take still shots of the concrete, absolute truth of the world as it exists now.
Yet I see each individual as a film projector.
Creating the reality that they see around them.
My compassion response is frequent with this perspective held.
All the film projectors do not even realize that they are film projectors.
They think they are cameras, only able to reproduce more of the same when in fact, they can reflect out a whole new upgraded reality. IF they choose to connect to who they truly are deep down.
The core essence of what it is to be human.
We are trained out of our authentic abilities.
Free will is a natural law.
Nobody can make this choice for you.
Only the individual can … for themselves.
Yet they do not.
Because they are not aware of the choice.
This breaks my heart … open.
Which could be viewed as “bad” but truly it returns my heart to its natural state.
It is an adjustment to live with an open heart.
Especially if most around you do not make the choice.
Many hearts open, but there are degrees of open.
Seems that whenever I think my heart is as open as it could possibly be …
It is broken open … just a little bit more.
Seems impossible for anyone to objectively know how open their heart is.
Me included there.
Through another’s lens of what they believe is like a camera, I appear strange.
Crazy even.
From my perspective as a fellow film projector, I see their choice as strange too.
Yet I understand it fully.
Lack of awareness is not a crime.
Live and let live.
The world we have setup almost criminalizes awareness.
Awareness leads to dissonant feelings between people …
when acting from different mindsets.
I have not found too many places where this has been stated out in a way that allows both parties to understand each other.
Here is my attempt.
No right or wrong. Two-point Logic.
More less optimal, more optimal.
Knowing that optimal is in the eyes of the beholder. Four-Point Logic.
Four-Point Logic allows for Live and Let Live.
Two-Point Logic does not.
As far as I can perceive anyway.
Wars, great and small, are the result.
How many people prefer this status quo?
An optimal question.
The answer is a personal one.
Nobody seems to know how to escape this status quo that is the wars amongst us.
Not so much willingness to consider what part, however small, each of us plays in towing the party line.
Maintaining the status quo.
No one person can maintain this.
But a tipping point collective of us can. And does.
Hard to digest this when one chooses to allow awareness in.
Look around you.
You know who they are.
You may not understand them.
You may not be inspired by them.  Yet.
They have not optimally assimilated this expanded way of feeling and being. Yet.
It is a pretty challenging game to achieve this assimilation in the world we live in today.
Truth appears different from varying perspectives (see picture at right). Linear thinking fails to recognize how varied and relative truth can be.
Only the perfect storm would even allow optimization to occur.
Are we there yet?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I would say we are not there. Yet.
Without willingness to transform ourselves (from that tipping point percentage of us), we may never get there.
I believe we will.
Perhaps we are there right now.
It is not fully in my awareness.
Does not mean it is not here right now.
See? Tricky when one chooses to allow the mind to soften its grip on needing to know all the itty, bitty details.
Understanding is not required for this.
Attempting to fully understand it, may actually decelerate the process.
Not logical. Not linear.
Four-Point logic.
My awareness reminds me of the many forces at play that will remove, more and more, the ability to maintain this unsustainable system of systems.
I have faith that there will be enough of us able to re-direct people to optimize themselves and create a much improved lifestyle for everyone.
With freedom and meeting basic human needs. For everyone.
That is the good news.
The more difficult to digest news is that the transition period likely results in things appearing less optimal before the more optimal can be experienced.
A full-speed locomotive cannot stop on a dime and take an oppositely directed track instantly.
Will take some maneuvering.
The more of us that choose to take this Leap of Faith and collaborate/coordinate the shift, the quicker the higher harmony can be experienced.
I have so many hypotheses about how this could be enacted.
Ready and willing to test some out.
Ideally with a fair amount of collaboration with other facilitators.
We will synergize the key concepts to streamline the process.
There is a fierce faith and courage required.
Kind of like MacGyver, we will learn by doing.
Solve the problems creatively as they come into attention.
Open Data.
Copy Right.
A couple of key concepts that will enable the solution to be brainstormed on the fly.
Our systems of individual help are so “one on one” …
In the Allopathic, Integrative and Alternative Health Models.
I see the need to be able to optimize people in groups.
There are optimal ratios, that will change as we get more adept at this:
Facilitators to facilitated.
I feel a minimum of three facilitators yet, “the more, the merrier” to begin with.
Maybe at first it could be a 1:1 ratio of facilitated to facilitating.
We will get better and better at doing this efficiently and effectively.
Working towards 33 facilitators enabling and empowering thousands at once.
Events will be planned with key components present to allow for this transformation of the personal wellness industry.
Entertain even … while optimizing the individual. En masse.
But not in the ways we have been up to now.
New techniques and practices will be required.
Educating the individual on the importance of their connecting to their film projector functions.
Facilitators can only be effective with the optimal participation of the individual desiring facilitation.
It will not be passive.
Yet this does not have to be very difficult either.
More of a return to the natural state than transforming into something completely different.
A Rising of the Phoenix from the Ashes kind of thing.
An alignment to the most optimal natural laws.
A natural process for a Human Being.
The challenge is how far away from our natural state we now find ourselves in the collective experience.

It is my dream to collect willing facilitators to get started on this synergistic collaboration of Open Data.
Ideally, before large numbers of the population have connected to their need for this.
Let us get a Jumpstart before the needs are more widely recognized.
If our systems are unsustainable, no time like the present to start creating the new systems that will support the more authentic, natural-state human being:
Wild and Free.
My version of Wild and Free is with the important backdrop of Live and Let Live.
First Do No Harm.
And … Respect for self and others.

Click the link associated with Rising of the Phoenix from the Ashes above.
Josh Groban sings Let Me Fall.
It sounds scary, yet the reward for the pain of transition is so great.
The song can really soothe the soul if you choose this path.
A therapeutic song to me.
The unofficial video is so beautiful.
Truly we all dance on our own pole. (Yes I am cheeky like this.)
Fundamentally, this optimal journey I offer is to fall in love with yourself.
Then … you start functioning on a different wavelength or vibration.
It is magic.
I remind you here that I always translate magic to mean truth not yet optimally perceived.
Same translation for Crazy and Miracle.
Ponder this.
I believe this wholeheartedly. Openheartedly.
There is courage required to communicate this way. Believe me.
I had a lot of fear to release before I could write this “bad boy”.
I overuse this affectionate term in my life.
I love “bad boys”.
Some days, everything is called a bad boy.
I do hope my lighthearted, silly natural style translates well into this writing.
I am pretty Innocent.
Not unlike every single one of us.
No matter what you have been told before.

Lyrics of Hope from Let Me Fall … Falling Off The Edge … of the illusion that I am simply a Camera when, in fact, I function more like a Film Projector when I return to my Natural State:

The one I want, the one I will become, will catch me.

Tell yourself this. Believe it. It will be optimal for you.
I guarantee it.

Music is a Beautiful Doctor for the Soul.
Listen to your heart. And your soul.
They know the way.
As instinctively known by the Buffalo, the quickest way through the storm is to head straight in.
Buffalo are the only species I am aware of that acts in what can seem like a counter-intuitive way.
However, to follow along with the storm indefinitely seems extremely counter-intuitive to me.
How I view the majority choosing in the world I see around me.
Yet, do we not want to get through the storm the quickest?
I feel that most people would choose to.

I call this Beautiful Truth.
It is Glorious!
Yet, some coaching may be required for a lot of people before they can see this level of Truth as Beautiful.
It starts out extremely inconvenient and uncomfortable.
A big reason why it has been seldom chosen consciously.
Most of us end up here not fully aware of what we chose.
Our authentic self blows up our life somehow.
For me, it was via Psychosis.
This dramatic path is not at all necessary for those choosing now.
My analogy for my experience is … kind of like a pressure cooker.
There were few outlets for the pressure to release.
I was an available pressure-release valve.
(Due to my active focus on self-actualization and optimization).
My first episode was 2012. Today in 2017, there are plenty of release valves so it is a lot less likely.
However, with certain filters and beliefs in place, it could still happen. And does.
But I hypothesize that it will never happen to me again.
The transition is integrated enough so that a full-blown psychosis is no longer possible.
I would love to spread the word on how to better support those who act like pressure-release valves for the rest of society. Clean up some of those filters, beliefs and resistance within the body to the return to the natural state.
There are infinite paths, modalities and tools to enable this optimization.
It is challenging to see the solution when you, in a patterned and programmed state, are part of the problem.
Pay attention to that little voice in your head prompting you to some new habit/practice/facilitator/diet etc.
Intuition knows the way for each individual.

I created a playlist on Spotify:  Whole Heart – Beautiful Truth.
You Tube version of the Whole Heart – Beautiful Truth playlist.
Hand-picked. Field-tested. By Me.
I linked many You Tube videos into this writing from the playlist.
It is designed as a fun therapy for those who want to consider this decision to enable and empower themselves.
Perhaps each individual benefits from their own hand-picked playlist.
Music has a way of bypassing the logical mind.
Empowering messaging can be received to counteract the entrained education most of us have experienced.
The creative process is one of the possible tools to optimization.
Musicians spend their lives in the creative process.
Along with entertainers of all kinds. Movie-makers, producers of music videos etc.
The creative process potentially taps into things not available via other modalities.
People tend to create works outside of their everyday reach when they learn how to tap into the creative stream.
Optimal songs can help to connect to the Warrior Spirit within to gain the courage to walk straight into the Storm
In order to get through it in the quickest and most efficient manner.
Optimal to my mindset.
Unless you prefer slower, less effective options.
You are free to choose.
Be aware.

Addendum #2 (4:30PM on this day of writing):
I choose to share a bit about my writing process today.
My view (see picture) while I sit at the kitchen table of my City Home.
I had the album, Ember by the Ghosts of Paraguay shuffling over my Sonos System playing over built-in speakers here in the kitchen in between listening to the Beautiful Truth playlist (through my Bose Soundlink Mini – started using while taking breaks to smoke my CNT Mellow Yellow packaged cigarettes) and the various You Tube videos playing on my old Toshiba Satellite laptop – likely ready for Evergreening by industry standards.
I felt to fast today. A tool that I received great benefit from December  2016 – March 2017, weekly 24 hour dryfasts preparing for a Retreat in Costa Rica.
I felt to have a cup of coffee this morning (25% caffeinated, 75% decaf. Homebrewed), making it a “wet” fast.
I am wearing my new camoflouge pants. I have always wanted a pair!
My favorite jeans recently blew out. After wearing nearly exclusively for most of this year.
The only pair that was a proper fit and blue jeans. Put me on the market for a new favorite pair of blue jeans.
This camo pair fit me the best when I shopped last week, yet they are more like a long capri pant. I will need to buy a long pair of black socks to cover the gap when wearing in the winter. I am a slim version of myself since my Pranic Living retreat in March this year. I lost some weight. And keep it off easily. Kind of a “reset”. Now most jeans to fit my butt, are too short. I have relatively long legs.
I did find a pair of Levi’s. Not as adorned as I prefer. I have not owned a pair of Levi’s since I was a young girl. It was more GWG bell-bottoms that I adored back then. I remember so fondly, my Dad was involved in helping me to purchase a pair on more than one occasion. My present day Levi’s are on the edge of too tight. Expected to relax over time as these new fabric jeans are known to do. But they match my leg length. Yay!
So my new favorite jeans are illustrated in the picture.
Strange details, I know.
Just a bit of insight to the woman behind this writing.
Me sharing some mundane authenticity.

My recent smoke break had a few eclectic ideas that I am now adding into this second addendum.
Far more important additions follow. Yet I have this little habit of beating around the bush when speaking the highest authentic truth for myself. Especially when tender feelings are involved. It is a part of what allowed me to experience Psychosis. That is why I feel to include these unusual additions.

Two main concepts remaining to share are challenging for me. Yet, I feel to continue.
I peeked in on Facebook and found an excerpt that I felt was very synchronistic to see at the moment I saw it.
Words by a valued Teacher in my life, Bentinho Massaro. He does not need to beat around the bush as I feel to.
Reading his words make me feel that my own expressions shared here are not so bold at all.
This man has balls. Courage. No Fear. He connects to his own authenticity in a way that I do not. Yet I may never choose to be as bold as he feels to be. I feel he is delivering a similar message to mine, but much more directly and to the point. Not taking too much effort to explain who he is and how he came to express this message.
I understand very well, as I have followed his work for the past 6 years. His unique style, I appreciate.
His writing today, November 16, 2017:

Many people say they are ready for a 4th Density civilization on Earth. But are you really? Some people think they are pretty awake but when it comes down to facing other-selves they don’t genuinely care or dare to be defenseless and transparent.

Do you love others as your Self? And where appropriate or highly beneficial, do you love the benefit of others more than the safety and security that your conditioned man-made mind BELIEVES it needs in order to be OK? Can you cry honestly in the middle of a crowd with no defenses up?

Can you pause your inner narratives enough to sense into the reality of the different layers of a situation and see deep beyond the surface appearance of things? Can you see into the Heart of the beings around you, and not project your own stuff unto them? Can you truly care about another’s journey, more than you care about who they are to your safety or wants? Can you trust in your Self being always safe enough to open your heart to another? Can you love no matter what, or almost no matter what? Are you awake enough to your innate perfection to be vulnerable and transparent and essentially have nothing to hide from other-selves?

If so, you are ready. If not, you’re running out of time to do this inner work and truly commit to the vibration of innocence, humility and love.

The edge of the old planet Earth is coming closer to us all by the minute. Like the end of a treadmill catching up with you if you move too slow. You can either fall off the end of this world into a less desirable reality or come along with the heavenly changes as they continue to pick up speed. But this requires you can also pick up speed and take loving chances.

Expand your comfort zone to include love for all beings.

Take a good honest look at yourself and your behavior and see if you are ready for 4D. If not, prioritize your spiritual success over your earthly success ASAP. Change your desires from needy, petty, human and mundane to desires along the lines of Knowing the Infinite Creator in All Beings.

(END of Bentinho’s message. I added the bold enhancements and pulled out the expand your comfort zone sentence. Facebook does not allow for bold enhancements).

Pictured is the Dalai Lama, well-known for his unconditional love and compassion.
Not so successful at making a mean face. So cute!

I encourage you not to get hung up with any unfamiliar terms in Bentinho’s quote. Like 4th density potentially.
Feel into the spirit, the intention behind this message.
It is a fierce love.
Reminds me of the latest Wonder Woman movie . She demonstrates this Fierce Love very well. An epic analogy available in the scene linked to Fierce Love. (Spoiler alert though).
I dream of the day when we can all take off our armour.
I prescribe you to watch this therapeutic film depicting the Fierce love/Compassion combination in the setting of World War II.
Movie Medicine I like to call it.
I do not think this fierceness is natural, but we do not live in a natural environment for humans.  Yet.
I do not condone violence.
But if each individual could take the necessary time to search their soul and strike up some courage, they would likely come up with some right now actions that could be taken. Personally.
The more that do this, the merrier we will all be.

My expression and this one from Bentinho could be considered a description of unconditional love, which naturally results in compassion. I do not feel it can be reached as fully via duality mindset (two-point logic) but requires collaboration over competition. Multidimensional mindset. Four-point logic.
When I first experienced this in a holistic way, I was locked up. Chemically incarcerated. Epically misunderstood.
For loving “too much”.
By the duality system that is Traditional Psychiatry in our current world.
I understood why. I shared that mindset once too.
Sadly … they were completely unwilling to attempt to understand me.
Why? Because they felt they already knew.
I presented in a way that people have been presenting for centuries?
It is a choatic transition. The body is seriously overwhelmed with this new energy system coming online.
Fuses are blown. The best way I can think to describe it.
The opportunity to address this misunderstanding is systemically not offered. Yet.
In the traditional Health System of the Western World.
Developing countries figured this out. Having a lack of access to Pharmaceuticals.
The more we can align our environment to more fundamental natural laws, the less likely we will see choatic transitions like mine. A big hypothesis, shared by many. Just not those holding the power in our unsustainable system of systems.

Here I live, 5 years later. Lots of time to integrate my experiences. Along with educate myself about viable alternatives. Speaking of the current compassion I am swimming in, a summary came to me:

Others are intolerant of my lack of intolerance.
I am challenged to tolerate the intolerance of others.

I would love to think that this could make some sense to you if you have read this far.
My expression here today feels like a love letter to a lot of key people in my life.
Perhaps everyone I have ever interacted with.
I tried to pick out key people but the list just got longer and longer.
Every interaction I have ever had led me to this mindset I now feel is the most authentic one for me.
Not an illness. But a viable alternative mindset.
As I continue to coalesce with like-minded people, it will look less and less strange to the former mindset.
I guarantee this.
My life is my experiment.
And my letter of unconditional love.
Too much love?
Is there such a thing?
Can I be understood optimally? I feel yes.
When and if others are willing to receive my best attempts at explaining why I am the way I am.
It can look strange to the uninitiated (I tease here).
But to me … it is Beautiful.
Yet kinda’ weirdiful too.

Sometimes I feel my life is a big cosmic joke.
It makes me laugh/cry.
A complex feeling, not unlike compassion.

I now notice that I ended up not including anything particularly personal.
I was going to include a long list, using nicknames.
Some select conceptual details of my interpersonal challenges.
But in the end, it did not feel necessary.
I will honor my own discomfort in this.
It is just fine.
I am human after all.
If it speaks to you, you were probably on the list. haha

***All bold blue words/phrases are links to either a website or a music video. They are meant to be an integral part of the writing. Many are music videos designed to stimulate the right side of the brain. The left side gets more than its share of attention.


“Enable the self-healer within.”

Angèle Beaudoin, Beauvera Health, Address, Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, Postcode.


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