Intolerance: Insidious, Everywhere (Including Within You) and Powerful

Intolerance has many hues. Have you ever stopped to wonder what effects this has on your own and everyone’s experience?
Anti-smoking sentiment is the most socially acceptable form of intolerance.
Yet there are so many others.
As justified as most people see it, particularly nonsmokers, I see it as suboptimal: to use your power in unsupportive ways.
It is far more optimal to communicate about your own choices.
To yourself mostly, and to others if necessary.
Example:  I prefer not to be in the company of people when they are smoking. A personal choice.
Maybe some assumptions have been made, but you need to be free to choose your experience as much as possible.
Somewhat suboptimal as judgment lies within …
{I feel concerned about negative health benefits to people who smoke.
I am concerned for the public health costs for smoking related illness.}
… yet everyone should be free to voice their opinion. If not necessary, I would encourage you to withhold your judgment while making your own personal choice. To the best of your ability.
Keep in mind, the truth is a lot more relative than we have been educated traditionally.
Ultimately, decisions to smoke or not are personal.
There is responsibility on the smoker to live and let live too.
Pick up butts and garbage related to smoking. Take personal responsibility for your choice as best you can.
Consider the choice for nonsmokers who do not wish to be present while you smoke. Etc.

Could there be a day when we can simply be aware that there is another person having their experience and leave it at that? A stepping stone could be to get curious about how the ills of the world have come to be created. Yes, sometimes others’ choices get in our face. When we can trust ourselves, we know that we can harmoniously communicate with others when we need to.
(OK, I am talking about the relative harmony in the developed world. Once survival is mostly out of the equation. When people are struggling for basic needs, the luxury of fine-tuning communication may not be as available. Hint: Take notice when there are populations struggling to thrive. It is relevant. It impacts everyone. Solutions exist. Willingness to enact them? Not always.)

Other common examples:
When you struggle with money, you may be intolerant to those who do not.
You may resent their ease with money.
You may delight in the complexities of looking after their assets – cars, homes, computers, phones, BBQ’s etc.
You can be exulted to learn that they are no happier than you are, perhaps even less so.
When you have financial freedom, you may be intolerant of those who do not.
You may resent their needs when they come up in your face.
Not just begging on the street but friends and acquaintances too.
It is easy to judge their past decisions as just cause for their struggles.
Of course there is a balance.
We all take some pride in the areas of life that we feel a certain level of mastery.
How do we handle it when we see someone else lacking what we feel is optimal mastery?
I see various tactics used out in the big wide world:
Thinking critical, judgmental thoughts about it. (Putting your focus on what you do not prefer. Felt by the Physics of Consciousness to support more of the same.)  The most common?
Aside – choosing to find positive things to focus on, even though they coexist with the less desirable circumstances, enables the Physics of Consciousness to work on your behalf. It can feel magical, but truly it is a Science. A Science inconvenient to the status quo. Value your vibe. You create it with your mindset and thought patterns. Extremely relevant to harmonizing human potential.
Back to the tactics when we see things not preferred:
Telling someone else with authority how it is done.  A common one.
Pointing out the justifications for the current challenges (as you see it).
Resenting and judging the other. Then turning your back to them.
I offer: have compassion. Consider how you are inspired to help. You may not be inspired to.
That is OK. BUT if you are not going to help, at least do not hinder.

My point: Judgmental, critical thoughts by themselves are a force in this world.
I believe the impact is a powerful deceleration of human potential.

As in the words of Steven Covey, author of The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People:
Seek First to Understand, Then Be Understood.
Often we do not have the time. No problem. Then train yourself to Live and Let Live.
In other words, untrain yourself to judge and criticize. You may need a coach for that.
I joke but feel free to take me seriously.
It takes a lot of time to truly understand someone. It may not fit into your day most of the time.
Consciously be aware of your thought patterns though. Throwing your power around to create more of the same? Seems counterintuitive.

You may be itching to lend a hand.
Consider if the individual truly wants your help. If they are not asking, a gentle offer but do not assume that your help is required or desired. Even when it could seem very helpful – from your perspective. Willingness to receive help needs to be present also. Maybe it is just me but sometimes I see the other as needing to help playing a stronger role than is my preference to be helped.
Is the apparent requirement from another of your help tied into your own self-worth? Beware.
Need lies in the eye of the beholder.
No two beholders will hold the same perception.
One man’s need is another’s life lesson in self competence.

The quality of your thoughts and observations may in fact create a subtle, yet powerful hindrance.
Have you ever considered this?

I believe that this entrained practice – of being intolerant of others, in ways great and small – has a much greater impact on our society than most like to be aware of.

I am such a fan of live and let live.
But also, unconditional compassion and love for the fellow human.
It is an Art. But also a Science.
I call it the Physics of Consciousness.
Simple, yet complex at once.
A paradox.

Let me attempt to explain based on my belief system.
Certainly, it may not be your own.
Yet it is good practice to consider the perspectives of others.
I do my best, yet am continuing on my learning curve of life.
As we all are.
I see the challenges.
I see the solutions.
Yet I only control one person: myself.
I have had to untrain myself to let go of any attempts to control others.
Training is ongoing.
I want to be truly helpful.
This is a decision that often cannot be made alone.
It requires a conversation.
To my eye, this refusal to manipulate others is not the common trend in the wider society.
Usually with good intentions.
For me, good intentions can be just a socially acceptable form of power and control.
Somehow having good intentions gives one the carte blanche to overstep boundaries in order to allow one to control those around them. To mold them into their likeness.
Diversity has not gained favor with those in power. Fear of change. My perspective.
I focus on observing, taking the best of what I see and reflecting my observations.
I desire to shine a light on problems that have been unrecognized in a tangible way.
Not necessarily in the moment.
I am a huge fan of considering whether the other person desires my help.
So often, they do not. I honor and respect this.
I so long for the reverse to also be true.
I feel often hindered by the strong desire of the other to help and support. In their specific way.
A subtle invalidation of who I am and choices I have made.
I want to be open to solutions, yet often the helper is not aware of the holistic situation.
I run into the opposite too. Where someone really wants and asks for my help. Yet I am not aware of the situation well enough to be of much tangible help. I help when I am inspired to and feel I can be truly helpful. From where I sit, it is the most challenging human condition to assess this properly. For both parties. Yet we can all do our best.

I hold a passionate desire to point out alternative perspectives with the goal of harmonizing the world around me.
Each individual is required to determine their own intentions and focus.
I warmly recommend that you consider a few points that fall under the Physics of Consciousness that may not be accepted in the consensus consciousness … yet.
We are more than simple atoms and molecules.
Each human being creates an energy field.
If this sounds ludicrous to you, I add a link for Heartmath Institute.
A video depicting the human energy field. Click on blue to watch.
The human heart has been found to sustain a powerful field of energy around each human body.
These energy fields entangle with each other – extending many feet around the body. The exact distance fluctuates. It is not a static measure.
Traits that we consider psychic, I offer are basic human abilities that we all have to greater and lesser degrees. To focus on these skills enables them to strengthen.
We were born with them, so they may not seem so obvious.
We have always been this way.
I speak to our ability to read the energy of others. Even their thoughtforms.
Consider the quality of thoughts you are thinking.
If others are subtly reading them, how might that affect them? What effects might you expect?

Personal coherence discussed in the 7 minute video (link above), when achieved by a tipping point percentage of us … will transform our world. I believe this wholeheartedly. I feel we are approaching this tipping point right now.

I recall a simple demonstration of nonphysical perceptions in a group setting.
A person was asked to stand at the front of the room.
Three people wrote supportive words on a piece of paper.
Then the same three people wrote non-supportive (judgmental) words on the paper.
The person in front of the room could clearly feel the difference.
This person did not consider themselves to be particularly psychic or intuitive.
I, and many others, believe intuition is a basic human ability.
Conscious awareness can vary.

Consider you are performing a task. Perhaps you are still on your learning curve and are a little frustrated.
Your boss is watching.
The boss could be thinking very critically about your lack of skill.
He/she may even be attacking your character.
This employee never gets it right. Look at them fumbling away over there.
The boss could be supportive in their thoughts.
I wonder how I could enable this employee to master this skill.
I wonder if this task is a good fit for this employee.
Perhaps it is better suited to another.
I will give them some time to work it out for themselves, then possibly ask if they require any help at a later time.
This is just an itty bitty example.
I believe that the supportiveness of the thoughts of the boss, impact the quality of the work by the individual. And how that individual feels in the frustrating moment.
The other side of the coin.
The employee may have been inundated with non-supportive talk throughout childhood.
So even if the boss is not thinking it, they have a negative self-talk loop running in their mind.
Self-deprecating thoughts run commonly through the collective.
We were taught this in childhood. Or not.

I find this holistic view at every interaction relevant. Yet tricky to optimize.
Awareness is an important step.
When things do not feel good, are not going well, is it within me? Or are there hindering effects coming from outside? Or both. What choices do I have to improve the situation? It is a giant experiment, this life.
Experiment away.

So back to intolerance…
The world is laden with this entanglement of entrained critical and judgmental thinking.
The belief: I am right. You are wrong.
There is such a thing as the best way.
For me … this is an illusion.
Right is in the eyes of the beholder.
Can we agree on this?
The more we can all recognize this, it would be a healthy start.
It is not uncommon to feel so right about something … and then another detail comes into your awareness that turns that right feeling upside down.
The truth is relative.
The truth is relative.
The truth is relative. To lots of stuff.
(Many would say that we create our reality. Again … a topic for another day.)
Can two versions of the truth exist simultaneously?
I say yes.
Play around with that one. Be open to this.
Life gets way more interesting.
Compassion and efforts at mutual understanding go a long way.
What is true for you may not be true for me.
Relative. Remember?
We are all free to choose. Lots of things. Maybe not every single thing.
Your freedom of choice is your most optimal power point.
Our systems are set up to be less than supportive to the individual.
We find ourselves in a variety of glorious messes. Often of our own creation, but not always.
How to get out of our current suboptimal loop?
Optimize the individual. And become aware of the systemic roadblocks and ways we hinder each other.
Can we shine a light on our intolerance of others?
Highly recommended.
Gets sticky though. Even once we want to reduce and eliminate our intolerance, we will be met with intolerance. It is viral in our world.
Well … there will be a time of transition.
The more who choose to get on the live and let live train, the quicker we can achieve a more harmonious community. In my humble opinion.
Individual … to family … to community … to neighborhood … to city … to province … to country … and the world.
Micro to macro. One individual at a time.
It is hard to take off the training wheels when we increase our tolerance, we will be bombarded with so many others bumping into us with their training wheels still on (intolerance). We get bumped. Again and again.
Yet we still need to try to ride our two wheelers without training wheels.
We will fall over again and again. Until we learn to maneuver with greater skill.

Intolerance to religion, gender, sexual orientation, skin-color, race, political affiliation, choice of clothing, physical illness, mental illness, deformity, smoking, addictions etc., etc., etc.
On a more minor note: Intolerance of imperfection.
Which way is best for the toilet paper roll to be placed in the holder?
How to handle the toothpaste in the bathroom?
How to organize the home and kitchen?
What proportion of time we should spend with our love partners?
The list goes on and on.
Choose your level of focus consciously.
Assess your results from time to time.
Not feeling too good about life?
Time to tweak something.
In your perception.
In your perspective.
In your mindset.
In your thoughts.
In your actions.
If you truly desire change, the change will likely start with you. Somehow.

Shine a light on your intolerance.
It is likely there.
Optimize your communication skills.
Easier said than done in my experience.
Presently I am focusing on this in my own life.
Where I am on the learning curve is anyone’s guess.

Not to say we cannot create preferences for ourselves.
Nobody wants to be walked all over.
Manipulated into somebody else’s delusion.
“I” statements.
I feel X when you do Y.
Compassionate, heart-open, loving (at least supportive) communication is key.
Not easy. But doable. Eventually.
Ultimately, it is a basic human need to be authentic.
To be respected.
To be loved … exactly as we are.
“Right” or “wrong”.
To be clear, I do not believe in right and wrong.
One man’s right is another man’s wrong.
Infinite versions.
To me this type of supportive communication coaching will be the new black in personal healthcare.
(In addition to better care for our multidimensional anatomy. Our energy field. Can be optimized with a variety of modalities. Another topic for a different day.)
How to tease out the most authentic version of ourselves?
To find our way to be ourselves in the wider world of others doing the same.
If individuals cannot gain some level of mastery with this, the individual will not experience vital health and the world cannot know peace.
Perhaps over-stated, perhaps not.
I am challenged in this area as we all appear to be.
I am willing to keep working at it.
I will do my best.
My best will continue to optimize.
I intend …
to tame the monster (of intolerance) within me.

Peace out.

“Enable the self-healer within.”

Angèle Beaudoin, Beauvera Health, Address, Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, Postcode.


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